Look at You

"Can I not do anything except stare at you while you're eating?"

These are the words I spoke aloud to my daughter as I was nursing her this morning... and I felt instant remorse. I heard the Lord in my ear saying, "Have I ever said the same to you?" REBUKE!

This week especially, I have been trying to wake up before Wilma, in an effort to have time to brush my teeth, get dressed for the day, make my coffee, and spend time reading and in devotion. But, of course, it hasn't been working. It's like she knows I am up, so she wakes up too and is ready to eat...

This morning, I decided I would drink my coffee and attempt to read while nursing, but Wilma had other plans. She wanted to play with the pages in my book while she ate; she wanted to stop mid-feed to look at me and babble. Those moments are so precious, but instead of soaking them in, I got upset.

I wanted "me time!" I wanted to not be needed. I wanted to sit and enjoy my book in peace. How selfish! My little needs me, and what a precious gift she is! How incredible is it that I can provide for her so simply with my body, my touch, my voice.

I have often thought how I get a glimpse into the view God has on me when I look at my daughter. She is completely dependent on me, as I should be on the Lord. She calls to me when she is happy, sad, lonely, scared, in need; all times I should be looking to God. Am I?

The Lord is always present, and He is so gracious! Imagine all the times in your life that you have become upset, angry, hungry, etc. and the Lord has provided. He doesn't keep tabs; He doesn't ask for thanks; He provides. He loves. He forgives.

I pray that I can become as gracious and loving as Jesus. During the devotion time I did eventually get today, I read a prayer, that I added to, and repeated throughout the day. I encourage you to repeat it today too.

*Jesus, Good Shepherd, I surrender my ideas, my expectations, and my life to You again today. I am part of Your flock. Speak. I will listen. I will follow Your lead. Let me be loving, be kind, and proclaim Your name in all I do and say today. Amen*

-prayer adapted from Lectio 365 morning devotion on Oct. 6, 2022-